January 30, 2018
March 28, 2018


If you take nothing away from the MANual and these MAN notes take this as the most important character foundation of them all.

Real men take care of and support their families always, in all ways.

The greatest honour and duty any man can have bestowed on him is the honour and the privilege of being put in a position where his purpose in life is to support, love, protect and provide for a family. There is no greater love than the love a woman gives to a man. There is no greater gift in life than when a woman bears a man’s children. The least you can do is take responsibility and give your life to them.

The greatest problem facing the world today are men, sorry, “males” who do not stand by and provide for their families. It is, in this man’s opinion, the greatest evil and the greatest sin one can commit against humanity when a man does not provide for and support his wife (mother of his kids) and children. I truly believe that if it were not for the love and commitment of single moms (who for the most part are abandoned by males) this world would be in a greater state of anarchy than it is today.

Real Men stand by their wives, girlfriends and lovers. Real Men provide for and are role models to their children. There can be no excuse for a man not supporting, providing for and loving his family. Yes, this is another one of those pesky actions that Real Men do every day because they care and love their families; they do this because they are Real Men.



  • You my friend,will change the world.
  • You will be regarded as a Real Man.
  • You will be the envy of other males.
  • You will create and leave a legacy for generations to come.
  • You will know and experience the true love of a woman.
  • You will experience and know the true love of a child.
  • You will be someone’s hero.
  • You will be a man amongst men.

Oh, but if you need to look for a reward for doing this you are a chop.



  1. There is no manual on how to stand by and provide for your family. You do not need one because you know what to do and how to do it. Yes, it does take time, patience and sacrifice. You have all of these skills in abundance. If you do it right (hell even if you do it wrong), you will learn more about yourself than you will ever teach them. If you do it consciously – having a family will show you so much about yourself and what you need to change.
  2. Your wife and your children are gifts from God. They give you a purpose in life. They inspire you to do great things and to learn the true meaning of the word’s sacrifice and unconditional love. If you allow them to show you – yourself, you will receive joy beyond words or imagining.
  3. It’s not really that difficult. Someone once said that all we can do for our children is to love them unconditionally and give them a good education. Sigmund Freud said the greatest gift you can give your children is to love their mother. So, you love by doing and being there. You give them all of you; by your actions and the role model behaviour you give them an outstanding informal education; and you love them and their mother unconditionally.
  4. Woman and children spell the word love -T I M E. Spend the time and they will feel the love. Be with them, support them, encourage and provide for them, and you will have little else to do.
  5. It is true that Real Men love a good challenge. You will never find a greater challenge than the challenge of raising well-rounded, special children. A greater challenge still will be to love, honour and understand a woman. Believe it or not, a lot of men actually do understand women. Are you ready for the challenge of your life? If so go to it with passion, courage and a sense of humour. If not, keep it in your pants.



I made a mistake; I walked out and left them!
We all make mistakes. Leaving your tackle in the way when you close your zip is a mistake. Forgetting to pay your, I’m a Low Life monthly magazine subscription may be a mistake; walking out on our flesh and blood and not being with or providing for your family is not a mistake, it’s a monumental f-up! Let’s get the wording correct before moving on. Well, shame on you! So, what are you going to do to make it right? You are pond scum and the lowest form of life on planet Earth. Now that I have gotten that off my chest I have to ask, “so, what are you going to do about it now?”  It is never too late. Expect a difficult path, expect rejection and even hatred (you deserve it) but suck it up, be a man and make it right or at least try.

I’m really having difficulty providing for and supporting them because of financial considerations.
Real Men understand that times get tough. But tough times never last; love, trust and guts do! If times are tough tighten the belts, do away with all the luxuries and provide for your family. Work an extra job, wait tables, pump gas or sweep the bloody streets but make plan. I have handed out pamphlets at traffic lights to people and friends in my community in order to provide for my family. No paying job was beneath me. I know as well that there are millions of men who have a whole lot less than I have had in my life and they stood by and provided for their families. Make a plan.




“Growing up I was taught that a man has to defend his family. When the wolf is trying to get in, you gotta stand in the doorway”BB King

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  1. Ludi says:

    Many men are single parents where the women walked out.
    Its not just the man who is the bad guy.

    • Gavin Sharples says:

      Maybe you can write a note to these women. I’m a man writing to men about men who do and don’t support their families.
      Thanks for the note and the balanced perspective.

      • Feroza Desai says:

        Wow, so so true words. Hit my so close to my heart. The structure the mind the physic of a man is to be the protector and provider and taking that aspect away and making the woman ” do it all” is sad, it leaves doubt, confusion and bitterness in a relationship. Men need to stand up and take control and be the hunter like he is intended to be. Been the anchor of the home i know exactly first hand how this can effect everything. So much we consider woman as multitasking and she can do it. damn no she wants you to meet her half way in all tasks. Lazy men will produce a lazy nation. men that support their families are rewarded in many ways that he cannot imagine. He will be the king and she the queen. Like the sun working all day to allow the fields to be sowed while she is the moon, that calms the night and makes things beautiful. One cannot do without the other but they both have their places. Be man enough to take the wheel and steer the ship and let her give you the directions.

      • Sean says:

        I think most men want harmonic happy families. I think there is a huge blind spot in the fact that many woman make it impossible to be with them. Many women, through verbal and physical abuse, as well as threats and false and exaggerated allegations make it so the man is not able to be in his proper place as Father and Husband.

        HUGE DISRESPECT coming from women now days from all I can see’

        And I think the majority of men want to make these relationships work, but the women are literally destroying them’

      • Dineo says:

        Wow Gavin this note! The sad reality is that it becomes a vicious cycle, a man walks out on his kids and their mom; daughter doesn’t get to experience her real first love and son will think it’s okay to walk away even when there are kids.

    • Dudley says:

      Agree with you here Ludi. I respect the article and realize the need for articles like this as it is core and fundamental to what we as men need to do to build our values and morality in todays society. That being said, I also feel there is short comings or a gap where women are taught how to treat and RESPECT a good man. Now respect can be many things to many people but there are clear guidelines on what respect can be in todays society. in laymen terms it is mutual and equally applicable on both sides…

  2. Steph Clark says:

    Brilliant article Gavin! I am grateful to be blessed with an amazing husband with whom I have shared my life with for 25 years!

  3. Lucille Maujean says:

    Such a breathtakingly honest and real message, thank you once again Gavin!
    To all the Real Men out there, well done, keep going. It is all too easy to throw in the towel and walk away.

  4. Bruce Smail says:

    Many thanks once again for another very insightful feature.

    Always look forward to what you are going to produce next.

    You never disappoint

    Well done once again.

    Kind regards, Bruce.

  5. Rose Beard says:

    This message should go on every billboard , not only in SA but around the world .

  6. PAUL BENECKHE says:


    Makes me always think and I do share, as it’s important to create awareness and “The Gavin” TOUCH!!!!!!!

    Thank You.

  7. Grant Rogerson says:

    A great article Gav. Thank you.

    Kind Regards

    Grant Rogerson

  8. Allison Gallo says:

    We can always expect sound advice from you Gavin. You are a man of real worth and I wish to thank for your contribution to society through your publications.

  9. Pieter Geyser says:

    Again so to the point as can be, I agree with your message, been on a rocky road a few times but made it to 33 years of marriage, three lovely children which became six through their partners and now four grand children. So amazing that the marriage that I once thought was not going to make it during the tough times is now the best and only thing that I live for through the grace of God.
    “Vat hom papa!”

  10. Irene Minnie says:

    Hi Gavin

    Great article hope every man can read it.


    Irene Minnie

  11. Dhevena Foutie says:

    thanks Gavin … this message is exactly what I needed to share with my husband. You spoke out for me.

  12. Charmaine Rosemann says:

    Brilliant contents Gavin, I have seen many good loving wives and seen how the children suffer. So true, all children wants to see is their mother been loved by their father. – the greatest gift you can give your child.

    Charmaine Rosemann

  13. Joan says:

    You are always the best at how you put it in perspective. Love this months one – yet once again :)

  14. Jabu says:

    Only REAL man can share such wisdom. Thank you Garvin for this REAL and priceless piece of teaching.

    Kind regards

  15. Thuli Mofokeng says:

    Sooo profound, what wisdom!!!

    • Steph Vermeulen says:

      You’ll just need to fix this slip-up Gav. When posting comments you made up, letting your own profile pic appear makes it too obvious.

      • Sharples says:

        Thanks for your kind words – actually we do post all comments here from REAL CLIENTS who send us email replies on email and all other social media sites. For you to think that of us speaks volumes…. Sam Sharples

  16. Kenda says:

    AMEN !!! This needs to go viral …

  17. Russell says:

    Being a man means stepping up to the plate and swinging with everything you got. Even if you don’t have arms. Use what you have to make it happen.
    A great message. Men need to man up and stick to the commitment of raising strong boys who in turn will one day become great fathers and leaders.

  18. Venesh says:

    great stuff Gavin we need to be reminded of our responsibilities

  19. Ellen Stark says:

    Excellent article Gavin. Say it as it is…….love it.

  20. Antoinette Hartnick says:

    Great article. Thanks. The truth will set you free.We need more men as you mention in the article than this world we live in will be a better place less divorces and less broken homes.

  21. Hilary Müller says:

    So eloquent and to the point Gavin. Well done – this should reach more men. I appreciate the honesty in your articles. Yes …. we do need more Real Men!


  22. Angela Clark says:

    Agree 100% – beautifully writen, and if I may: coming from someone in the “entertainment” industry that is noble and inspiring, it’s a tough job, it’s busy months and slow months and busy years and slow years, and if you still chose to prioritise your family and work hard for the benefit of your children, well I think you’re pretty darn awesome. In my experience, this isn’t the norm in that kind of industry so THANK YOU and WELL DONE!!

  23. A Single Mom says:

    Respect! From a Single Mom

  24. Darryl Van Der Merwe says:


    You are an inspiration to me! Your newsletter followed me to New Zealand – GOOD thing :-)

    I met you at an IMESA conference some time ago and I have to commend you on being relevant then and so spot on again with your email messages.

    Please keep up the good work – If you ever are in NZ give me a shout!

    Darryl van der Merwe

  25. Karen Otto says:

    Good one!

  26. Jimmy Lee says:

    Hi Gavin,
    I fully agree but don’t lose sight of a mans Parents especially when they hit their later years in life. My Mom stays in a home for the aged and I visit often but there are many there who never see their Siblings, so sad.
    They are part of the family after all.
    Kind Regards,
    Jimmy Lee.

  27. Tanya Jackson says:

    This is the best newsletter you have published to date!
    It’s about time someone said the truth.
    Can’t we publish on the front page of the Sunday Times!

    I am very fortunate to have a husband who does provide but there are far too many women and children who never get to experience this.


  28. Ipeleng says:

    Thank you Gavin for the inspirational messages you always provide, God bless you even more


  29. Casper says:

    Thank you sir! Shared these wise words with my sons too.

  30. Keni says:

    Gav, thank you, you are a Super Star

  31. Jayson says:

    What an article, this one should go VIRAL, i could not think of a better way to wake me up and take my rightful position,duties and responsibilities towards my family.

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