HERE’S THE THING
I don’t know if you are like me, always looking for answers to life’s questions. Some people don’t bother themselves with stuff like this, and just go about their lives living in reaction to circumstances as they play out in their everyday lives. In a way, I envy the sleepwalkers. They question nothing, seek nothing, try nothing and just complain a lot and blame others for their situations. Me, I want answers and I ask and question every second of the day. Here’s a big one – How come is it, that some people achieve more than others when given equal situations? How come do some marriages succeed when others (58% to be exact), will end in divorce? How come do some people succeed on a diet while others don’t? How is it that some people are able to save, sacrifice and invest and others, not so much? How is it that every month, the same people outperform all the others in sales or KPA? How is it that some people will (and do) exercise, think about others, put in the hours, make the time, take a moment, say the words, pitch up, see it through, never quit and do what needs doing and others just quit and couldn’t be bothered?
Well I have the answer
I discovered it on my own, and I have been speaking about it for a while now. It’s so big, so massive that I really feel people don’t grasp its full implications. Either that, or the people I have explained it to realize the depth and the simplicity and realize that; it is in some way (who am I kidding – it’s all the way), pointing a finger at the person hearing the one quintessential lesson of all lessons.
This one truth is a game changer. This one truth can save you a fortune. It will stop wasting your time and money trying to get people to do …. well, anything.
If it’s important enough then you will – they will – find the time, make the effort and do whatever it takes. So, stop searching for reasons why your staff members don’t do what they need to do. Cancel the personal coach and the NLP course because you have the answer. If it’s something you want to do, you will do it. Because those who want to will, those who don’t – wont.
Have you ever noticed that the people who really want to do something – do it! People generally find the money for things that they really want. Even if they buy on credit – they make a plan.
When people exercise, study, or take time to visit their grandmother, it’s because they want to. If your partner is not being intimate with you, not being considerate, not spending time with you, it’s because – THEY DON’T WANT TO. People make time for the people and things they value and love. If they are important enough to you, YOU will make the time and do the do’s – and not only because it’s important to them and the relationship; you do because you want to do. Because those who want to will, those who don’t – won’t.
THE HOW TO
Our actions demonstrate how we feel (listen to this) IN OUR DEEDS. Our deeds demonstrate, without the possibility of words being misunderstood, our actual feelings. No clearer communication can there be – than our ACTIONS.
YOUR ACTIONS SHOUT OUT YOUR FEELING TOWARDS A PERSON. And what they clearly and unequivocally demonstrate is – “I JUST DON’T WANT TO, BECAUSE I JUST DON’T CARE”
If you really want to lose the weight, if you really want to get fitter and healthier you would literally do whatever it takes – every day, to get there. I am not at my goal weight and fitness level because I don’t want to give up some processed, tasty foods. I don’t want to never eat take-outs and burgers and pizza. I know what it takes to look like a Greek God but I am not prepared to sacrifice the pain and my lifestyle to look like I need the toilet really badly; and I don’t want to learn Greek. I’m not in denial – I get it. I don’t want to!
Your daily / weekly / monthly non-actions, tells your partner how unimportant they / the relationship is and how little you value them. Not only are they not worth any effort they aren’t even worth a few minutes a day or every other day.
Love is an action. Service is an action. Respect is an action.
When we want to do something, we show people how important they are, how much we value them and how much we want to be with them; how much we want to do with them, for them and because of them. When we want to, no effort or sacrifice is needed. You are never too busy and you make the time. It literally is “my pleasure!”
When we spend the time, make the thing, do the job, and are on time, never miss a day – we SHOW what we value in deed. When we WANT to do something it’s difficult to do a bad job. You see when we want to – we don’t have to try, or make an effort, because our heart is in it! A truth – which all staff should read.
You see when we want to – we will. When we don’t want to, we won’t.
If you have to motivate someone to do something, they don’t want to do it. So, move on and give your time, love and effort to those who want to.
What if I have no time? No one is too busy; it all depends on where you are on their list of priorities and whether they want to do it or not. When people show you how little you mean to them, believe them.
IT’S A SOCIAL MEDIA THING!